In yesterday’s blog, the emergence of the pang took center stage. There is something therapeutic in paying attention to what is happening in the body. My belief is that the unconscious mind talks to us through emotions and that these emotions can be located through our body. The act of being in the moment and paying attention somehow releases the energy that gets bound into these emotions.
The feeling of the pang was absent today, it may not be gone. I’m certain that the fear of time running out and my time with Boeing coming to an end will arise again. I believe it will arise in the same fashion, as the pang that I describe yesterday. If I am too preoccupied it will grow and may surpass what I felt and turn into something larger and different. If noticed early and attended to, then at that point then it will begin to recede. It really is that simple.
The magic of writing each day is that it gives me a few minutes to stop and ponder about what went on today and how it showed up emotionally. This wouldn’t have to be shared with the world to be effective, though I believe it does have to be heartfelt and authentic to have any therapeutic power.
My hope for today was to find a good job lead. I was blessed with two. The first is a position with the Gates Foundation. This organization has caught my heart because of the good work that they do. I don’t like that my current employ supports the defense business, so working for a company like the Gates Foundation has quite a bit of appeal. I found this position in my regular searches, so I think I might be getting the hang of this.
Writing is not easy for me, and for it to be good takes a lot of time. This type of writing is relatively easy, and I know it could be much better if I spent more time editing and polishing my writing. This is nothing like writing a cover letter. These take me forever and the harder I work at it the more mistakes I make. I spent a good chunk of the day writing or thinking about writing a cover letter to send to the Gates Foundation and I still have more work to do on it.
The second lead was received in a call from a dear friend. And this will result in a information interview sometime next week. Thank you friend. :) I have been studying community building and social networking for the last year and have been amazed and the power of what I was studying. And at the same time, I had no concept of my own network. Receiving this warn notice is just what I needed in order to understand what I was learning, to understand the my network is of the greatest importance. And not just in troubled times. My gratefulness grows with each day.
I know this seems like the reverse of what I said about the paying attention above. It has to do with how you feed it. By not letting yourself get sucked into the negative emotion your dissipate it. The same happens with positive emotions, if we don’t let ourselves get pulled into it, it will dissipate also. My appreciation and gratefulness is growing because I am letting myself get pulled in.
The Cherokee have a story call the two wolves that goes like this:
A Grandfather from the Cherokee Nation was talking with his grandson.
"A fight is going on inside me," he said to the boy.
"It is a terrible fight between two wolves."
The young grandson listened intently.
"One wolf is evil, unhappy, and ugly: He is anger, envy, war, greed, selfishness, sorrow, regret, guilt, resentment, inferiority/superiority, false pride, coarseness, and arrogance. He spreads lies, deceit, fear, hatred, blame, scarcity, poverty, and divisiveness."
"The other wolf is beautiful and good: He is friendly, joyful, loving, worthy, serene, humble, kind, benevolent, just, fair, empathetic, generous, honest, compassionate, grateful, brave, and inspiring resting wholeheartedly in deep vision beyond ordinary wisdom."
The grandson paused in deep reflection of what his grandfather had just said. Then he exclaimed; "Oyee! (in recognition).
Grandfather continued; "This same fight is going on inside you, and inside all human beings as well."
The grandson paused in deep reflection and recognition of what his grandfather had just said. Then he finally cried out deeply; "Oyee! Grandfather, which wolf will win this horrific war?"
The elder Cherokee replied, "The wolf that you feed. That wolf will surely win!"
Which wolves are you feeding in your life? And how is that working for you?
Tomorrow: Finish up my cover letter and research.
inSite Group 53
Jobs applied for: 19
Rejections: 7
Job Posting withdrawn: 1
Interviews: 1
All the positions I applied for at Boeing are closed to new applications. I’m sure they have invited the people for interviews already. I’m considering the chance of getting an interview with any of them now at 0%.
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